Sunny Shit

Seriously people, what's with the need for everyone around you to be sunny and spouting off about rainbows and butterflies. SHUT UP! No, I don't look happy. Yes, I'm probably raining on your parade but saying something other than "oh i'm good" in response to your "hey how you doing?". No, I don't look well at all, probably look like I haven't slept well... haven't in years, your point being? Yes, I tend to be rather testy at times. I'm in chronic pain. Keep hassling me, telling me that you need me to be sunny and cheery all the time? And you're going to be in some chronic pain yourself, at least until the casts can come off.

Hating Hurting

I try to work though it and do what's best for my body, but it kills me. Getting up every morning when I feel terrible. Driving to work even though it hurts. Smiling and being nice to everyone even though my brain feels foggy and the pain makes me want to start screaming. It's killing me. The thought of another 50 years of this? It's terrifying. I'm not looking forward to the future... and for a girl who had such big dreams... it hurts more than the fibromyalgia